Well, the one good thing about being laid up is that you have time to catch up on your reading. The bad thing is if you decide to catch up on your email and it's full of CRAY-ZEE. Well, not all crazy. Some are just very impassioned about their viewpoints. When I find two letters that are perfect point/counterpoint to each other - I have to share. Let me just present them and ya'll go in...
I'm a successful, good looking black single black man with my own home living outside of Atlanta. I know you and the BnB people will have plenty to say and maybe it will change my mind but I doubt it. Long story short, I'm not dating black women any more. They only want me for one thing (money) and apparently I don't have enough of that for them. I'm tired of playing the games when I have women of other races throwing themselves at me and actually wanting me for me. I've had so many bad experiences with "the sisters" that they really aren't even attractive to me any more. Maybe if there was one that looked and acted less black, she could still get considered. Really just wrote to see what you had to say about it.
Here's what I have to say... Deuces.
Missing you already,
Michele (on behalf of The Sisterhood)
p.s. Did you seriously say maybe if someone looked or acted "less black"? You are excused from BougieLand.
After my last relationship broke up, I came to a really hard decision. I gave up on dating black men for a while and decided to try something else. Everything with black men is just dramatic and painful but my interactions with white guys have been easy. The white guy I'm dating now just treats me so well, it's like a whole different world. Our backgrounds are completely different but it doesn't seem to matter. He gets me. It's so perfect with him, it's almost scary. I always thought I'd end up with a brother but I think I've found what I've been looking for. What really makes me angry is all the attitude and anger I'm getting from people. It's 2010 and still I'm getting the "swirl" backlash. Just, really - what do you think?
-Name Withheld from San Diego
What do I think about what? You need to get love where you find love. If you found someone you're happy with, go with that and damn what anyone has to say about it. But um - the thought that life is going to be so much easier and happier in the "non-black" side of dating scene... let that go. People are people. It may be a good idea to take a look at what destroyed your previous relationships and make sure you didn't drag any of that into your new "perfect" world. Good luck!
So um... people still think happiness comes wrapped in one specific color huh? Still don't realize that the problem may be them, no matter who they date? BougieLand, it's all yours. What do you have to say to Gerald and San Diego? Please get them told...