Is it wrong to just be in it for the "cocoa"?


[Author's note: BougieLand regulars know that I try not to discuss the cocoa. Yes, it's a euphemism for adult naked aerobic activity. Just bringing up the hot chocolate tends to send the comments section into well... heat. So let's keep it bougie out there today, shall we?]

I recall having a discussion with a male friend of mine. It actually started out as a discussion about Ecclesiastes 3:1. You know the one, it begins: "There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven." Somehow, he took this as Jesus' okay for him to spend some time slangin' cocoa freely amongst willing females. I'm fairly positive Jesus is not cosigning heaux-shenanigans but I was reminded of that conversation when these cases came up. Let's take a look.

Case 1) Lance (aptly named) is upfront with all the women he sees... and he sees quite a few. He tells them straight up that he's just in it to hit it. The women agree and enjoy themselves but (in his words) "someone always catches feelings" and then he gets "cussed out and called a dog." His question to us was - if he's being upfront, he's single, healthy, responsible, doesn't poach - why is he a dog? Why can't a young man enjoy "the ladies" without being hated on? 

Case 2) Andrea is three months out of a bad relationship. Actually, she's out of a string of bad relationships. She is officially exhausted with the whole "significant other chess match" (her words but I'll be stealing them). She's decided that for now, she only wants "no strings" cocoa. But wouldn't you know, the first man she, uh - stirred the cocoa with decided that he wants more.  He knew going in [pause] that she wanted to keep it casual. But now he's angry that she is not willing to take it there. He said she shouldn't be "hoeing around" when she could have "something real." Her question to us, "Why I gotta be "hoeing around"? Can't I just have a little light-hearted fun for a minute?"

What do you think? Are we (as a society) still too judgmental about other people's slap~n~tickle business? Are we hatin' on the Lances of the world? Or is there a line (number?) after which we start to think of Lance as a male slut? What about Andrea? Why can't she take a wild on the side for a hot minute without being called a ho? Thoughts, comments, insights? (Try and keep it PG-13, people)