Lessons learned from Mr Jack - a guest post by JasonP


Today, JasonP wants to talk about last week's controversial letter writer, Mr Jack. Mr Jack broke up with his girlfriend of two years because she didn't cook and talked back. Let's see what he's got...

I've been hanging around BougieLand for about a year and half now. Never have I seen the level of outrage and irritation that was directed towards Mr Jack in the Ask A Bougie Chick segment where dude wanted a woman to be his everything and not an iota less. Last I looked there were over 200+ comments. That post seemed to bring out a lot of feelings in people. Before I share what I learned, I have a few observations.

1) I'm not Mr Jack, don't bring it here
2) Why so angry, ladies?
3) Why so touchy, bruhs?
4) He mighta been wrong but was he so very wrong?

Here's what I think I learned-

The truth is... it is a man's world. I could say it prettier so that the ladies won't threaten to knife me in back alleys but facts is facts. For the over 60% of us that are still traditional in values, the man is still the head of the household, the aggressor, the final decision maker, the one who gets down on one knee and proposes. But to assume that a man's world could even exist without women is stupid. 

It's a man's right to hold out for exactly what he wants. HOWEVER, he should do this with the understanding of snoozing and losing and that old saying about the early bird and the worm... also true. Plus it's not like great women are sitting around tapping their foot waiting on the Jacks of the world to roll up. By the time Jack comes around, that perfect woman is with an imperfect man who made her feel good compared to what. (Don't act brand new, you know exactly what I mean by that)

Who told Jack he was the catch of the year? Who is to blame for half decent guys (I know more than a few) walking around acting like they could levitate and part the Red Sea at any moment? Ladies? Get your friends. Some of them are throwing panties, car keys and accolades at bruhs who used to get an eyeroll and a "boy please". Yes, I blame this on the sisters.Some of you are way too eager to get got. And then act surprised when you do.

Can we talk a minute about bedroom beasting and why it's so dangerous but so damn good? Truth time. I have definitely prolonged a relationship that I knew was going nowhere because the cocoa was hot. Like Nola  Darling "Gotta Have It" hot. Got you standing outside a woman's door pleading, "Please, baby, please, please!" That kind of good-good skews the whole game. You will overlook a lot of otherwise "unwifeable" behavior for the regular hot cocoa. (I bet at least four of you will have issue with the term unwifeable. It's a descriptive, not a derogative. Stay with me ladies)

Lastly, who stays with someone they are that unsure about for two years? I'd would rather date 15 women in 12 months to find one great one than stick with one that was just okay for two years. Am I the only one who thinks this way?

Jack came across self-absorbed and slightly deluded but we only got a snapshot of his situation. At the end of the day, it's not a bad thing that he knows what he wants and won't settle for this. But I have to wonder if he has what it takes to go get it. Thanks for the floor and the edit so I sound like I have some education, Chele. *drops mic and flees the left exit door*

Well now. Jason had some insightful observations. What say you? Do thirsty women create the egos of the Mr Jacks of the world? Does the early bird really get the worm? Can hot cocoa turn your brain into mush? What's better? To serial date a lot of people or to try and make it work with one that you're not 100% sure of? Any thoughts about Jason's thoughts? Do share...