Checking In vs Keeping Tabs


I was enjoying dinner with a girlfriend Saturday night when her phone started blowing up. Her man wanted to know where she was, who she was with and what she was doing. Now these are grown-azz folks over the age of 50. This dude was checking on her like she was a fast 20 year old let loose in the football dorm after curfew.  It got to the point where she handed me the phone and asked me to tell him who I was and that I'd just asked her to dinner at the spur of the moment. After looking at her like she was crazy, I snatched the phone and said into it, "You're joking with this, right? You aren't seriously asking a grown woman where she is at 7:00 on a Saturday night?"

**Click** He hung up. She said he just moved forty minutes away and had been crazy possessive since then. And since some of you are mad dramatical, no - he's not abusing her, she not being stalked, he's a lonely guy who finally landed a woman for the first time in five years and is clinging way too tight. Ugh. Clingy, needy, insecure. Three of my least favorite things in the world.

On the other side of the scale, I'd been gone all damn day and I got one text from 3N - "Have fun, call me later." Sure, there are times when we're texting/tweeting/calling back and forth but usually it's to find out why I'm late finalize plans, chat, or laugh about something on TV. If either one of us called the other asking "Where are you and what are you doing?" something crazy would have to be going on.

Personally, the only time I ever felt the need to consistently text/call/drop by on someone to figure out what they were doing - I was trying to catch him cheating. That's no way to live. Won't go back there and wouldn't put up with it from someone. Not at this point in life.

So let me ask you - What do you do with the clingy and paranoid? Where do you draw the line between checking in and keeping tabs? One call a day? Two texts when you're apart? Do tell...