We've chatted all week about game killers. And we talked a little about people that we don't even want to invite to the festivities. The game is still the game but wouldn't it be great to get to the point where you don't have to play anymore? That part of the game is called winning. You get the girl/guy and you keep them. Happily. If not ever after, at least long enough for both parties to smile over the "good times."
So what are some characteristics that can change the outcome of the game?
1) Attention to detail -
Losing: A male friend of mine used to do the exact (exact!) same thing first three dates. First date, he'd show up with daisies and take the lady to an out of the way jazz spot. Second date, mixed bouquet and a seafood place. Third date, roses and dinner at his place. He'd ask her to bring dessert (or be dessert, whichever worked). Why did two exes meet up at the jazz spot by chance one night and compare notes? The fall-out was EPIC. All he had to do was take five minutes to play twenty questions: What's your favorite flower? What's your favorite color? What's your favorite food? Dude, make an effort. He didn't. He lost.
Winning: Rob, a BnB regular, wanted to propose to Amy with a great ring. All he knew was that she didn't want a traditional princess cut diamond in a regular setting. He called me and Jayme and said, "She loves pink, she hates gold, and she wants simple." He gave us a price range and that's how Amy ended up rocking a gorgeous pink diamond in a platinum setting on a simple band. (Yes, she would have accepted his proposal even with a crap ring but that's not the point of the story) Attention to detail, people. Rob won.
2) Sincerity. Check this ridiculous but true story:
Dude had been hitting on chick forever (seven weeks). He tried every ticky-tacky line in the book. Finally, he just rolled up and said, "I don't want to get married, I just thought we could get some hot wings and have some sex."
Dude got the date and the cocoa. Sometimes, people just want to hear the truth - even if it's raw. He won.
3) Ability to communicate -
Losing: Ladies and Gents, we have GOT to stop thinking that our psychic powers will kick in at any second. Very few of us have the ability to read minds. I vividly recall a girlfriend of mine just bitching about her boyfriend. "By now he should KNOW what I WANT!" I wondered aloud, "Did you ever tell him that's what you wanted?" Her response, "Well no." Me (with eye roll), "If he's done it this way all along and you never told him you don't like it, how is he supposed to know?" Her, "He just SHOULD." Girl bye. Which is exactly what old boy said not too long after this drama. She lost.
Winning: Let me take a moment and send out some soul claps, 14 snaps, 6 hallelujahs and an ovation to the folks here in BougieLand. One thing we are not shy about is sharing what we think, how we feel and really just about anything else that pops into our heads. I get emails from people really appreciating the fact that we try (really, really try) to stay open to everyone's opinions on all our random topics. Doesn't hurt that some of our commenters appear to be real easy on the eyes. Game on. Communication rocks. Skills and knowledge you pick up here can only make you shine brighter in the real world. We win.
Talk to me BougieLand, finish this scenario. Someone is interested in you, you are just not feeling it. What is the one (or two or three) things they could do to change that no to a yes? Top gamechangers... the floor is yours.